Get out of major cities, the zombie apocalypse is here!

[Sucker Punch]

http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/05/26/2818832_naked-man-shot-killed-on-macarthur.html

One man was shot to death by Miami police, and another man is fighting for his life after he was attacked and his face allegedly half eaten, by a naked man on the MacArthur Causeway off ramp, police said.

[...]

The officer, who has not been identified, approached and saw that the naked man was actually chewing the other man?s head, according to witnesses. The officer ordered the naked man to back away, and when he continued the assault, the officer shot him. The attacker continued to eat the man, despite being shot, forcing the officer to continue firing. Witnesses said they heard at least a half dozen shots.

ZOMBIES

 

[Madferret]

Do it in the winter ffs

 

[Sucker Punch]

Cops are saying he was overdosing on a new super-LSD.  Government conspiracy?

 

[bustaheims]

Cops are saying he was overdosing on a new super-LSD.  Government conspiracy?

Gotta explain it away somehow, right? I'd keep your ax handy, just in case.

 

[GhostofPotvin29]

I think I had some super-beer last weekend.

 

[Heroic Shrimp]

I had a dream recently wherein I was being chased by zombie turtles. That's right, zombie turtles.

Protip:  if you're ever going to be chased by zombies and get to pick which species of zombie, pick turtles.

 

[Sucker Punch]

I think I'd pick zombie jellyfish.

 

[Madferret]

Zombie snails

 

[Bonsixx]

I think I'd pick zombie jellyfish.

I've definitely heard of more jellyfish stings than turtle bites.

 

[Sucker Punch]

Yeah, but most of those occurred somewhere in the vicinity of water.

 

[Sucker Punch]

Patient Zero has been identified as Rudy Eugene.

For some reason I assumed he was white.  All the real nuts seem to be white dudes.  But I guess zombies don't discriminate, so they've got that going for them at least.

 

[Heroic Shrimp]

I think I'd pick zombie jellyfish.

I respectfully submit that only animals that can demonstrate crazy eyes, bitey mouths and a tongue sticking out can become zombies.

 

[Madferret]

Patient Zero has been identified as Rudy Eugene.

For some reason I assumed he was white.  All the real nuts seem to be white dudes.  But I guess zombies don't discriminate, so they've got that going for them at least.

Someone needs to zombie app that pic

 

[maplesyrup]

 

[GhostofPotvin29]

Zombies are here.

5/16: McArthur High School HazMat Situation: Students, Teachers Decontaminated After Breaking Out In Rash http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/16/m..._n_1521764.html

5/19: No confirmation on chemical at Fort Lauderdale International Airport http://www.wptv.com/dpp/news/terminal-2-ev...in-hazmat-scare

5/21: Police: Man bites woman in Westchester http://www.mysuburbanlife.com/westchester/...-in-Westchester

5/23: I-285 reopens after hazmat incident http://www.wesh.com/r/31112110/detail.html

5/23: Man Bites Cousin?s Nose Off http://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/local/Man-...-153100125.html

5/24: Second Broward school reports mystery rash http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/05/24/2815...ol-reports.html

5/25: Hazmat Called After Kids Exposed To Pesticide On Bus: Hazmat, EMS Respond To Lake County, FL School http://www.wesh.com/r/31112110/detail.html

5/25: ?Disoriented? passenger subdued on flight in Miami http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/05/25/passe...miami-arrested/

5/26: Naked Man Allegedly Eating Victim?s Face Shot And Killed By Miami Police http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/26/n..._n_1548359.html

5/26: Florida Doctor Spits Blood at Highway Patrolmen After DUI Arrest http://abcnews.go.com/US/florida-doctor-sp...ory?id=16436402

 

[maplesyrup]

S*** I'm at work with nothing heavy heavy to use as a blunt instrument. Will a overhand smash with a stainless steel coffee cup work?

 

[Sucker Punch]

To add to the list;

5/29: http://www.complex.com/pop-culture/2012/05/in-other-news-a-man-ripped-out-his-own-intestines-and-threw-them-at-police-in-new-jersey

According to police, when they arrived, the man - 43-year-old Wayne Carter - had blockaded himself in his Hackensack, New Jersey home with a knife, and was threatening to hurt himself. After officers kicked the door in, Carter began stabbing himself with the knife and allegedly threw bits of his skin and intestines at officers before attempting to swing the knife at them. Officers sprayed two cans of pepper spray at the man in an attempt to subdue him, to no effect. He was finally overpowered when SWAT teams arrived, and was transported to the hospital for emergency surgery and psychiatric evaluation. He is currently in critical condition.

 

[CarltonTheBear]

It was nice knowing you guys.

 

[Madferret]

I've been preparing for this my whole life

 

[Madferret]

• In a grisly twist to the case, a graphic and deeply disturbing video has emerged which is purported to show the murder and dismemberment. A Montreal police source confirmed cops are in possession of a video, which also includes cannibalism, but would not say if it is the same video.

http://www.ottawasun.com/2012/05/31/note-with-severed-foot-threatened-more-killings-report